Three weeks already!

Samuel was three weeks old yesterday. I still feel guilty when I do things that aren't for him, but I have to get over that eventually. He is sleeping just now but I still get the impression that I'm doing the wrong thing taking some time on the 'puter to myself. Oh well.

He is developing really well, focussing on things and moving his head about. We are trying to get him to follow toys with his head now, rather than just his eyes. This will help develop his neck muscles and hopefully he'll be able to hold his head up soon. He occaisionally picks it up for a moment, when he's being wriggly baby, but it is part of moving his whole body so I don't think it counts.

I'm doing ok. Healing up fine and I think my iron levels are working their way back to normal. I'm much less exhausted. Most mornings I'm struck by weepies though and I decided to talk about this with my GP. We had a good chat about it and I'm going to get an appointment to speak to someone about everything I have been through the last few months. I wasn't that happy as a pregnant lady (as most of you will know) and Samuel's birth was the most exhausting and traumatic thing I have ever been through. Being Samuel's mother is wonderful, but I need some space to process everything properly and make sure that the traumatic bit and the wonderful bit don't get mixed up in the chaos.

Thankfully, Aileen had noticed my looming depression just as I did. Which means I've done the right thing and I have someone to make sure I do the right things to get past this. All this does mean I'm tired and giving my energy exclusively to Samuel. He is developing well, which means I haven't infected him with my sadness and I want to keep it that way.

We'll be back on our feet again soon, I'm taking all the time I need.